Crazy Old Lady

Copyright © 1983 by Tiki Kritzer Seger.  All rights reserved.


There’s an’ old, drunk lady in the hallway,
she’s always lookin’ for a fight.
This old lady’s kinda scary,
she prowls around in the middle of the night.


Someone said she’s got a husband,
but he’s a waitin’ on death row.
An’ there’s a rumour of some children,
but where they are, nobody knows.


She starts cryin’ around midnight,
an’ howlin’ at the moon;
they let her out ‘a the insane asylum,
but she’s as crazy as a loon.


The landlord – he don’t like her,
an’ he always calls the cops;
but they say they can’t do nothin’,
it won’t help to lock her up.


Well, that old lady’s gonna die soon,
an’ nobody’s gonna care.
The state’ll buy her a coffin,
an’ put fake flowers in her hair.


They’ll bury her in swampland;
she’ll never have a tombstone,
an’ she’ll lie in there forever;
forever all alone.


There’s a crazy, old lady in the hallway;
leave her alone, she’s gonna die;
ain’t nobody gonna miss her;
ain’t nobody gonna cry.


Yesterday I saw her;
she was sittin’ in the dark.
This mornin’ someone found her,
stretched out cold and stark.


Well, goodbye crazy lady
an’ may you rest in peace.
I hope you find a place to rest
where you don’t have to sign a lease.


There was a lonely, old lady in the hallway,
an’ yesterday she died.
They buried her this mornin’,
an’ nobody even cried.